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Sunday 25 January 2015

Lingering a while...


I have been almost a week at the Oregon coast. The purpose was to be able to clear my head of all the chaos and noise and to be able to put together what God is leading us to offer for the reFresh Lent Journey this year.
There are people who know me well that question if going away by myself is a good idea... they are right to question. This much alone time is very challenging for me. It causes me to force myself out of myself and go seek connections with others. It causes me to come face to face in deeply emotional ways with my Saviour who is always with me, It causes me to see how I run to TV or facebook when I am lonely. It causes me to reach out to friends I have not reached out to for a while. It causes me to saunter and linger more. It is not so easy for me to frolic when I am alone... just being honest. 

I find as I am ending my time here, that I am not as productive as I thought I should be. And then I realised that I put the level of productivity on myself. And I wonder why I thought I should be at a certain level for this time....  At a retreat I was on a few weeks ago we talked about the Nautilus shell and how it has to grow from its current space into the next space to survive. 
We grow and shift and change with life. 
We are becoming who God is shaping and calling us to be.  
 When Saturday arrived, so did the people... the beach which has previously been quiet except for the sounds of nature was interrupted by children and parents and dogs. It was really only the little yippy dogs that were jarring to me. There was one that was quiet vocal and I found myself resenting its encroachment on my space. As though it was my space to be protective of....
 It is continually amazing to me how much we see of who God is and who we are when we take time to stop and linger. I don't always like what I see... but I know God loves me even with those not so pretty parts.
I am so excited what this year's Lent journey with reFresh. 
I hope you will join us. 

Wednesday 7 January 2015

I can do it all myself....


Growing up I, as many women, learned that I needed to take care of myself. 
Out of life circumstance and the society I grew up in, I had no choice. 

My grandfather taught me practical things like how to hammer a nail and use other tools well. 
My mother taught me to take care of my car and fix a toilet that is not flushing.  

I developed courage and confidence to travel alone by car, by train and by plane great distances and in foreign countries. 

I learned how to shoot a gun and how to build a fire.
 I learned how to chop wood and tend a garden.
 I learned how to change a light bulb and how to reset the fuse.

I learned how to cook and sew and clean and organize and ride a bike and care for children.

I learned how to drive a manually transmission-ed car, how to pump my own gas and how to drive in snow, rain and ice. 

I can kill spiders and take out the trash and mow the lawn and open my own doors.... 

Yes.
 I can do it all my myself. 

But is exhausting. 
And when my man does some of these things for me, I feel cherished, valued and respected. 
I am learning to ask for help. I am learning to let go of needing to do everything myself.
Thank you Robert for being a real man.