relationships are hard work

I realise that for most of you reading this, the post title is a "duh" statement. But I feel the need to ponder it for this post.

Every type of relationship with another human being is hard work.

With my siblings, I know we come from the same place... the same environment... mostly the same really emotionally and physically and mentally hard things. We learned together about how to be in a variety of situations.

Since we have not lived together for over 20 years now, we have adopted ways of doing things and ways of living that are not always how we were raised. And because we are each unique... even the basics of me being female and them being male... and the birth order of me being youngest, one being middle and one being youngest... there are a myriad of life experiences that are unique to each of us and a plethora of relationships with others that have shaped us to be who we are today.

With my friends, some of us were raised very similarly (values, church, free time, etc...) and some of us were not raised similarly at all. But we have found common bonds and common hearts to keep us connected as friends even over thousands of miles.

With all these relationships, I find myself looking for the balance of interdependency. A healthy dependence and independence. knowing I am needed and knowing I need the other. But also knowing I am quite complete in myself with the Lord.  It is not an easy balance. It takes hard work.

As seasons come and go with friendships and as my siblings and I grow and shift and change, and as I enter into deeper romantic relationship, I am finding it imperative to give selflessly, to love unconditionally, to speak truth boldly, to walk confidently in who God has made me to be but not at the expense of others.

It is hard work to admit I am wrong and it is hard work to draw into relationships when things are challenging, but if that relationship is important enough, I will work through the the hard stuff. I will not run away and I will not cling. I will strive to stand firm in love and truth.

relationships are hard work. but so worth that work.